Tampa Bay Should Just Quit Football

Wow. Bears just smoking Tampa Bay. Not going to bet on Tampa ever again. Their wins were clearly a fluke. What happened to the team that looked like they were going to the playoffs this year? Tampa Bay just needs to stop. Stop playing football, stop being a city, relocate the people of Tampa to another armpit of a town in Florida, and drop a bomb on the city of Tampa because they’re garbage.  You’re just going to let Mitchell Trubisky stomp you like that on live television? Every single Tampa Bay players significant other should leave them, because they’re worthless. In conclusion, no more bets are going on Tampa this year and I am putting out hits with the mob on all the members of the team and the coaching staff.

Josh Gordon Will Be Critical To Patriots Win Over Dolphins

Josh Gordon. The man who led the league in receiving yards in 2013. Everyone thought he was done at one point or another after the 2013 season, between his substance abuse problems, and finally getting cut by the browns two weeks ago, most people would think his career was towards its end, however I think this is where Josh Gordon will truly begin to shine. The Patriots have a system where tons of wide receivers have come and played excellent football, especially ones with very similar situations to Gordons, the Hall Of Fame Legend Randy Moss for example, who had his fair share of controversies before coming to the Patriots in the 2007 season. The Patriots have been in desperate need of a deep threat wide receiver, as the other receivers on the team haven’t been enough of a threat to opposing secondaries (obviously excluding Robert Gronkowski, who in the past 3 games has been at least double-covered, creating limited big play opportunities for the leagues best tight end). Josh Gordon has the potential shake up what looks like a very slow and ragged offense, and expect Gordon to really shine when Julian Edelman returns in week 5, creating a wide receiver situation that will be very similar to the Texans or Steelers current situation (Deandre Hopkins and Will Fuller, Antonio Brown and Juju Smith Schuster) where you have an incredibly talented Wide Receiver, coupled with a deep threat Wide Receiver which creates ample scoring opportunities. It’s still technically unknown if Gordon will be playing in week 4 or not, and if he does play, what kind of role he will have on the field. However, if Josh Gordon does get out on the field today against the Dolphins, expect a big performance from him, because he’s going out on the field to prove he is still relevant to the game of football.

Jerry Jones Is Now One Of The Dumbest Humans On Earth

 

Jerry Jones has just made potentially the dumbest statement of all time, that he sees similarities between the Rams and the Cowboys offenses…. Dementia has clearly set in early. Have you watched the Cowboys offense this year Jerry? The Cowboys offense shows more similarities to the gigantic floating pile of trash floating around the pacific ocean than it does to the Rams currently sterling offense. The Cowboys are 1-2 going into week 4, and are probably going to be 1-3 going into week 5, in all honesty their offense has no excuse to be as poor performing as it has been , seeing as they have one of the best backs in the league combined with the fact that they have a top 3 Offensive line in the league as of right now. The Cowboys have 41 points of combined offense going into week 4, and the Rams have 140 points combined offense with their week 4 game already out of the way. My advice to Jerry Jones would be this, maybe run stupid shit you’re going to say publicly by someone that knows whats going on with Football so that the whole internet doesn’t end up viewing you as a moron.

NFL Week 4 Picks

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Week 4 already? Football season goes by way too fast, I know its unrelated to this specific blog but professional football should be played year round, these guys are making millions of dollars a year, I’m sure they can manage. Alright, to start this off I am not going to write about every match up, I am only going to write about match ups that I am dropping some bucks on. Let’s start off with Thursday night football this week the Minnesota Vikings at the Los Angeles Rams, I just talked about how the rams are my lock for the NFC in the Superbowl, they are playing incredible football right now and I think Sean McVay and Jared Goff are capable of bringing them there. The Vikings on the other hand, just got blown out by the Buffalo Bills who going into week 3 were considered the worst team in football. I like the rams on this to exploit the Vikings defense and win by at least 10, I am putting money on the Rams with a -6.5 spread. Next game I want to talk about is the Cincinnati Bengals at the Atlanta Falcons, Falcons have a -5 spread for this and the Bengals still don’t have Joe Mixon to create an efficient running game, also AJ Green isn’t performing the way he normally does. The Falcons however just came off of a huge game, yes they lost but they put up some serious points on offense with Julio Jones and Calvin Ridley who is working his way towards a astounding rookie season and is the best rookie WR in the NFL right now. This games going to be tough fought for the Falcons with their defense facing so many injuries, but I think their offense right now is good enough to pull of at least a 6 point win so I am putting my money on the Falcons. Alright now coming up on my slap in the face spread of the week which is the Tampa Bay Buccaneers at the Chicago Bears, The bears are a 3 point favorite. Exfuckingscuse me? The bears do not have the capability right now to do serious damage on offense, the hardest part of this game for Tampa Bay will be for the offensive line to keep Khalil Mack away from Fitzmagic. I’m not even going to show this spread any love, I’m betting the money line on Tampa Bay. Moving on to the Seattle Seahawks at the Arizona Cardinals, Seahawks are going to be playing against Josh Rosen, who is a rookie QB that I just don’t have any faith in, also when you call yourself the “Hebrew Hammer” I am going to naturally hate you, you have to earn that nickname bud and I’ll let you know when you  have done that. I am taking the Seahawks on -3 point spread, expect the Cardinals to still be winless going into week 5. Last Sunday night game we’re going talk about is the New Orleans Saints at the New York Giants. The Saints are favored at 3.5 against a New York Giants team that just looks like hot garbage, their only win of the season comes from a win they scraped together against the abysmal Houston Texans. Saquon Barkley and OBJ are absolute weapons, but when you have one of the worst Offensive lines in the league It doesn’t create many scoring opportunities. Now the Saints on the other hand looked spectacular last weekend in their overtime win against the Falcons, they have the ability to create countless scoring opportunities (expect an even deadlier offense in week 5 when Mark Ingram returns to the lineup) and their defense is going to tear into the Giants. Last game I am going to talk about is this weeks Monday night football game, the Kansas City Chiefs at the Denver Broncos. The Chiefs are favored at 4.5, I feel like this one just really speaks for itself. Now, I don’t know if Vegas is thinking of a different Kansas City Chiefs, but favoring them only by 4.5 is nuts, its tantamount to giving away free money because while Showtime Mahomes is slinging the ball for Kansas City, garbage teams like the Broncos just don’t stand a chance. Expect the Broncos to get destroyed like Lil Xans tummy after some flaming hot Cheetos. I am putting my money on the Chiefs it’s my lock of the week. There are some other really good games this week, but none that I feel confident putting money on. Give the twitter a fucking follow for the love of god @degensportsblog. Leave some comments on what you would like to see another blog post on today.

Tiger Is Back!

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Tiger.Fucking.Woods. We got a rare treat this past weekend we got to see legacy Tiger, we got see see early 2000’s Tiger. Tiger came out and smoked the competition he is unarguably back. There’s people out there talking about “Oh well it isn’t a major so he isn’t really back” are you literally incapable of thought? Yes it was a 30 man tournament, but it was the BEST 30, It’s not like he went out and smoked amateurs, Tiger crushed the best in the game and that’s a huge accomplishment, Tiger showed this weekend that he’s capable of winning any tournament that’s coming at over 40 years old. If you look into it tigers already got the most wins, Snead’s 82 wins are impressive however some of them don’t even count as three of his wins come from a 36 hole tournament according to PGA tour policy for an event to be considered a tournament it has to be at least 54 holes. If you take this into account Tigers already won it and is the best to have ever played the game without an argument. However, if you don’t take the wins from Snead, Tigers going to win at least 3 more tournaments, Snead won the last one of his at 52. Tigers got a lot of golf left ahead of him and he’s going to crush this record and become untouchable. Congratulations Tiger Woods, enjoy banging every single Hooters waitress within 100 miles you stud.

Pittsburgh at Tampa Bay

Well let me just say, my bet on Tampa for the second half paid off, it may have saved me even, its not even Monday Night Football if I don’t place a second bet to cover my first. Let me start off by saying I’m going to use a good amount of Fitzpatrick puns, so if you don’t want to see those, well that’s too fucking bad. Fitzmagic still has got it, yes yes I know the Buccs still lost, but they did have a pretty glorious comeback  try and went for the Steelers throats. The first half of the game we saw a different QB, we saw Fitztragic, the guy that gets traded around the NFL like a pocket pussy on Blue Mountain State. However, Fitzpatrick went into the locker room and obviously had a meeting with his fairy god mother or some shit because Tampa almost formulated a comeback, and Fitz transformed back into Fitzmagic again. Tampa still looks really good, and I like them as a playoff team. Now lets talk about the Steelers, they pulled out the win and Le’veon Bell is going to get traded, James Conner is the man for the job and is literally being paid 200,000 dollars less for his whole season than Bell would make in a single game. This is a win-win situation, we’re going to see the Steelers save some serious money, and Bell is going to go to a team that needs him, and to be quite honest he’s going to have an insane performance on any team in the NFL. Want to give a shout-out specifically to Vance McDonald, who legitimately murdered Chris Conte with a  devastating stiff arm, and there’s never even going to be a trial. So from a fantasy standpoint I am winner this week, I had James Conner, JuJu(in the flex of course) and Mike Evans and I’m in a PPR league so you do the math on that one. I’ll do another blog later today probably on Tiger Woods being completely and unmistakably back, and maybe another one on the games i like this week and my picks, give the twitter a fucking follow you scum bags @degensportsblog

Tampa Bay Halftime Shit Show

Well being wrong on your first prediction? Going to level with you folks it does not feel good, granted we’re at halftime and all I need is a 1 point victory for Tampa to cover, crazier comebacks have occurred *Reference Patriots 2017 Superbowl victory*. Let’s talk Fitzmagic, the first two picks he threw were and still are inconsequential as they weren’t his fault, first one happened on a popup when a linemen got his hands on it, and the second one Mike Evan’s didn’t run his route correctly (third one falls on him though, fucking garbage pass). Although he threw three picks essentially back to back, he came out the next drive and wasn’t afraid to sling the ball for a huge gain to Evan’s, dudes got balls of steel, its like getting turned down three times in a row at the local bar and asking the next girl you see if she wants to fuck. The second half belongs to Tampa and I smell a comeback coming. Also real quick on the new roughing the passer rules, they’re ruining the fucking game, from what I’ve gathered so far if a player sneezes on a QB, Its about a 600 yard penalty and the team loses their first round picks for the next 35 years. They’re punishing 300 lb dudes on this rule that literally cant stop running because they’re essentially a mac truck going downhill in a snowstorm without brakes. Its bullshit and it’s not only ruining football, but its causing a rift to form between myself and my bookie because, well quite frankly I cant pay the dude if I keep getting screwed like this.