All season long, the National League has been insanely competitive. The Brewers were one of the top dogs all year and finally proved they have the guts to win their division in the end. Christian Yelich won the batting title with an average of .326 and missed the NL Triple Crown by only 1 homer and 1 RBI. The bullpen has been anchored by the likes of Racist Josh Hader and Jeremy Jeffress, who’ve been a devastating 1-2 punch ending games. They added Moose and Schoop at the deadline to stack their infield even more. In a perfect world, they’d be set for a win in the NLCS. But the Dodgers added Machado and Dozier and have gotten a postseason gem from Kershaw, giving up only 2 hits in 8 innings to the Baby Braves. This NLCS matchup will feature a huge advantage for the Dodgers in starting pitching, but the Brewers have the offense that can get to them. Plus the 11 wins in a row including regular season is poising them for success. The series starts tonight, and it’s gonna be a fierce one. I believe the Brewers can win it, and I hope they do because watching the Dodgers choke every postseason is extremely enjoyable.
It’s done, the man needs to be fired. Last night proved what we essentially already knew, Eli is hot garbage. I bet you cant name the last time a RB had 230 yards from scrimmage, and their team lost by THREE TOUCHDOWNS. That’s insane, for Barkley to go out and perform like he did, and his team was able to score one touchdown? That’s pathetic. Listen manning’s stats on paper aren’t that bad, 281 passing yards and only one interception, but he had an abysmal 66.1 passer rating, and was 24/43 on completions. You don’t have an excuse to have those stats, when you have one of the most talented wideouts in the league coupled with quite possibly a top 3 Running back, you should be able to make plays. Yes, the giants offensive line is bad, but it cant be that bad seeing as they created opportunities for Barkey to run for 130 yards. I have heard all the excuses a giants fan can make for Eli, but you cant defend him anymore. The Giants need to throw in the towel for this year, go to rebuild, and draft a QB early in the first round next year, and just give up on Eli. If the Giants don’t look towards the future, they’re on pace to be the next Cleveland Browns.
LABron and the Lakeshow beat the Warriors last night in a potential Western Conference Finals preview. It’s only preseason, but you never know with that balding superstar who’s wreaked havoc on the East for nearly a decade. Nevertheless, the preseason has shown one thing: the strengths of the league’s shitpile squads (particularly the rooks). Luca Doncic has been a spectacular fit in Dallas this preseason, averaging 14 points per game in 3 contests. He looks like a flat out star and so does Trae Young of the Atlanta Hawks after calling game from the logo against the Spurs. Any team who got a lotto pick should be jumping for fucking joy cause this draft class could be one of the greatest ever. Other notable preseason rookies were DeAndre Ayton, Marvin Bagley, and Mo Bamba, who is the namesake of an absolute banger that is ripping up the party scene at your local university. The rooks put on some shows and hopefully they carry their performance into the regular season. Particularly guys like Kevin Knox and Wendell Carter Jr., who could singlehandedly spark a quick rebuild for the Knicks and Bulls respectively. Meanwhile, teams like the Celtics and Warriors, who both had losing records in the preseason, either just don’t give a flying fuck about meaningless games or just need a couple weeks to get their shit straight. I’ll go with the first option since they’re the favorites to meet in the Finals. Hayward is integrating back into the lineup for MY Celtics and should be comeback player of the year as long as his back stops giving him shit. The Warriors should be fine but are looking like the Lakers’ young core could give them tummy aches when they match up. As long as Cousins comes back healthy and dominates the 5 like he has in the past, they should be golden. But their major flaw is their lack of depth at the center with McGee in LA now and Zaza out of the picture. They’ll need be extremely efficient elsewhere, which I don’t see as too much to ask.
Some familiar faces in new threads should prove to be refreshing for their fans and their front offices. Kawhi is looking so comfortable in Toronto it’s like he never played in San Antonio before. Even though his laugh sounds like a billy goat who got his testicles caught in a blender, expect greatness from him in the Six. Derozan should fit in nicely in San Antonio as their first option, and could possibly bring the ball up with DeJounte Murray’s season cut short due to an ACL tear. DeAndre Jordan finally said “fuck it” and joined the Mavs and should rejuvenate their front court. Julius Randle to New Orleans should be a nice compliment to arguably the best player in the league, AD. The Pelicans should be a surprising team and could potentially lock up a 4-5 seed come April. And he’s not in a new city yet but GOD DAMN JIMMY BUTLER YOU HAVE SOME GIGANTIC CLACKERS. He singlehandedly roasted everyone in the Timberwolves organization and I don’t blame him. Who in the world would want to play at the Target Center 41 games out of the season in nipple sharpening cold temperatures and a historically horrible and murder-ridden city? Jimmy wants to hit up a big market, which he should, because the Wolves are basically the former Bulls now and he wanted out of that shitshow too. He’d rather be the number one option in a system that is on the cusp of a swift rebuild rather than a disgruntled star in a system that has sort of rebuilt but will never contend in a superiorly stacked West.
And now a few bold predictions for the season that may be a little out there for some of you fucks:
- THE ROOKIE OF THE YEAR IS…. Trae Young. The ROTY voters will value his scoring, shooting, and playmaking abilities more than the physicality of Ayton and Bagley. Rebounds and blocks won’t mean shit. Young will most likely start for the disgustingly bad Hawks and Young should be waving his cock all over State Farm Arena cause this is his team now.
- The Grizzlies get their shit together and contend for the postseason (8th seed). Not quite back to the former Grizzlies, but the Memphis squad should expect a healthy Mike Conley and Marc Gasol being a consistent top center in the NBA. The West is so deep you can’t really see them getting a higher seed.
- Last but not least… The Nuggets will have a top 5 offense in the NBA and claim the West’s third seed. We’ve seen the Joker and his flashy passes, flashes of greatness from Jamal Murray, and a healthy Millsap could open up new offensive avenues. I believe Michael Porter Jr. will have a memorable rookie season and contribute to an already stacked Nugs roster. Beware of this squad.
A long blog, but only because this seasons about to be WILD.
P.S. Fuck the Yankees, Sox in 6 against Houston.
Til next time, cunts
I mean when you see an over like this, you typically want to tuck your tail between your legs and run the fuck away, but I’m a degenerate and I’m dropping every cent I can spare on it. I get it you’re thinking “but I’m a pussy Tyler, how can I bet the over?” well that’s easy, grow the fuck up and place the bet. The Chiefs offense is unreal right now, and are playing against a shaky Patriots secondary. However, the Patriots offense has a spark to it right now, with Julian Edelman returning to the field last week, and Josh Gordon becoming more confident and comfortable every week on the field, while the Chiefs defense is statistically one of the worst in the league. I cant tell you who’s going to win this game but I can tell you that this is going to be a high scoring game that will go over 60, turn off your night lights, conquer your fears, and place the bet.
I think I can speak for all Boston fans when I say this, beating the Yankees in the playoffs is almost as satisfying as winning the World Series (key word almost). Game 4 was more exciting to me than any other game this series, it was even better than our 16-1 victory Monday night. The bottom of the 9th was a drama riddled inning, Craig Kimbrel had his work cut out for him as the Yankees poised themselves for a come back in the bottom of the 9th, Sanchez almost put it over the wall while the bases were loaded and the Yankees were down 2 -4 which would have ended the game right then and there. Kimbrel kept his composure through the inning, but the real hero last night was Steve Pearce. Pearce stretched out to catch the ball thrown from Nunez like a trailer trash girl named Bethany does in her mid 30s. It was such an enticing game to watch, had me at the edge of my seat, screaming at the top of my lungs which hopefully didn’t wake up my neighbors, however if they weren’t watching the game themselves, they’re total nerds. And of course it wouldn’t be a Yankees game without one of their fans acting like a total and complete tool. One of the fans threw a full beer at Kimbrel as he came out of the bullpen, which missed him by just a few feet and could’ve seriously injured him, and I demand that this fan be brought forward and sacrificed to New England’s patron saint of sports Tom Brady. We are ready to destroy the Astros next, and move on the World Series after we tech them who the best team in Baseball is.
Even if he isn’t your QB, even if he plays for your rival team, even if you hate the guys guts, what Brees did tonight is downright incredible. He just passed Peyton Manning to become the record holder for the most passing yards in the NFL. Not only did he do it, he did it in style with a 62 yard Touchdown pass, and keep in mind Brees did this all before his 40th birthday which is in January. For Drew Brees to perform as he does at his age puts him in a class that only few QBS in history have been. Congratulations Drew, now get alvin Kamara the ball some more so I can salvage a fantasy win this weekend.
Yikes. Tough to be in the Bronx watching this game right now. I mean for me it’s a phenomenal sight to see as a Red Sox fan, you dream of games like this. The Red Sox are playing insanely well right now, and are actually playing like they finished with the best record in the MLB this year. This is the Red Sox the fans have been dying to see this post season. They’re just unleashing on the Yankees like a frat boy on a toilet bowl after too many yager bombs. Red Sox need to finish this game strong and finish destroying the people of New Yorks hopes and dreams tomorrow night.